Jul 1, 2012

How Charlotte Got Her Groove Back

OK, don't let the title of this post fool you.  Yes,  I was in Jamaica a few weeks ago but I did not "get my groove back" Angela Bassett/Taye Diggs style.  No, instead I am taking the advice of the Millionaire Matchmaker herself, Patti Stanger and spending some time in "Dating Detox".  In her book, Become Your Own Matchmaker: 8 Easy Steps for Attracting Your Perfect Mate, Ms. Patti stresses the importance of taking time to do the things that make you happy rather than looking for a man to fill the void following a breakup.  Since my children are spending a lot of time with their father this summer, I figured now is the perfect time for me to detox a little and have some "me time"! 

And what better way to put a smile on my face than to pamper myself a little?  On Friday, I went to one of the best hair stylists in the Nashville area, Patience Barton, and let's just say I did not leave disappointed:

I know, cute right??  For those that don't know, I'm 5 months into transitioning my relaxed hair to natural.  A difficult task at any time of year, but in this ridiculous 100+ degree heat it's enough to break a sista down and make me run to the salon for a hefty dose of "creamy crack".  But thanks to Patience's amazing talent with a blow dryer and round brush, I do believe I can last another month at least.  Thanks again, Patience!

Second step to getting my groove back was a girl's night out with a couple of my great friends.  It's impossible not to be in good spirits when the conversation and sangria is flowing ;-)  Here's a picture of me ready to head out for the evening:

Third, what kind of female would I be if I did not indulge in a little retail therapy to get me over the hump?  Of course, being a single mom I always have to stay within budget.  No point using the mortgage payment to have the cutest dress in the store, right?  Here's one of the purchases I made during my most recent session:

Very productive, wouldn't you agree?  Every time I wear it, I feel like a new woman!  OK, maybe not really but it's pretty darn cute.

The bottom line is I'm doing the things that make me happy.  I have been guilty of relying on others (usually the men in my life) to make me happy and that's just not healthy.  Right now feels like a good time to love on myself for a while and not worry about being in a relationship.  I mentioned in my earlier post, That Ever-Elusive Thing Called Love that my married friends have been telling me to enjoy my single life and to wait for true love to find me ever since my divorce more than 4 years ago.  But I never really understood what that meant until this weekend.  Spending time doing the things I love showed me I can have just as much fun alone and with my friends as I can in a relationship.  I want to spend time re-developing my relationship with God, which I have slacked off on a little recently.  I want to develop new friendships and continue building on my existing ones.  Today I spent 5 hours in Panera catching up with a friend I haven't seen in months and learned things about her that I never knew before.  That's what I'm talking about!  Then maybe when the time is right, I'll consider the possibility of a new relationship but for right now I'm just happy being me :)



  1. Love it Charlotte! Remember what happened after Stella Got Her Groove Back? Her 'groove' was a homosexual! Poor Terry. It just goes to show you - don't aim for a happy ending. Just be happy!


    1. Hayley, you are so right! Thanks for visiting :)

  2. Hayley that is funny.

    I have been telling you the same thing Charlotte. Having 'me time' is just like medicine. It picks you up when you are low and you get up and get on with life. I am so happy you have the confidence and strength to pursue the happiness you deserve. Men can make you happy but not the true happiness we deserve.

    Go Girl!

    Love the Angie Stone track.

    1. Thanks sis! Glad you enjoyed it :)